


My Love Shines On

by stars28



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Gen, M/M, Slow Burn, dog Chewie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2018-03-22
Packaged: 2018-09-18 04:46:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9368603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stars28/pseuds/stars28
Summary: It was really something to see them argue, as each student usually had equally good points about the piece of work the class had been given and both students had the intellect to back up their points. Instead of becoming friends over their shared knowledge (and passion), they had become enemies almost from the moment they set eyes on each other in September.





	1. 1/6.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the latest in stupidly long Poe/Finn fanfictions, but I can’t say I’m surprised. *shrugs* If you liked it at all, please leave me kudos. If you, by some miracle, loved it, leave a comment. They make me feel happy.

>   _“People hate as they love, unreasonably.”  
>  _ **\- William Makepeace Thackeray.**

The near constant arguing between Poe Dameron and Finn Storm wasn’t unusual. In fact, by halfway through November it had become quite commonplace for students who weren’t even in their class – Classic Poetry – to sneak into the lecture halls to listen in to the arguing. It was really something to see them argue, as each student usually had equally good points about the piece of work the class had been given and both students had the intellect to back up their points. Instead of becoming friends over their shared knowledge (and passion), they had become enemies almost from the moment they set eyes on each other in September. Neither Poe nor Finn wanted to see the other win, so they argued in every single lecture.

Although they were alike in their knowledge about the classics, Poe and Finn were not at all parallel in their note taking style. Finn used an expensive pen to write his notes in an equally costly notebook, he didn’t make mistakes. Poe, on the other hand, wrote his notes in a barely readable scribble using a cheap ballpoint pen on a cheaper notepad. He made many mistakes and always roughly crossed them out before continuing.

Unknowingly, the only thing that they agreed on – Poe never told Finn that he thought this and Finn never told Poe – was that everyone else in their class was below them intellectually. It had never be verbally acknowledged between the two teenagers and it would have stayed that way, had the final project not been set by their joint Professor.

<->

It didn’t help their class rivalry that on the first day of term in September, before the lecture had even _started_ , Poe managed to spill his hot coffee all over Finn. Though, of course, at the time he didn’t know that the teenager in front of him was destined to become his academic rival.

Angry spluttering came from in front of Poe, a dark-skinned teenager glaring at him even as he tried to brush the coffee off himself.

“Oh my God! I’m so sorry!” Poe said, stepping forward to try and help. How exactly, he would help, he hadn’t quite figured out, but his vague plans didn’t matter because the other teenager shot a frosty glare at him and walked – _stalked_ – away down the corridor.

Well, Poe thought, going to put his now empty cup in the bin, that could have gone better. And he had no coffee to fuel him through the lecture. Just his luck.

<->

Finn stalked away to the bathroom to see if anything he was wearing was salvageable. Of course he’d have the luck to get covered in coffee moments before the first lecture of the year. He sighed as he slipped his backpack off his shoulder and onto the floor. Working quickly, aware he had his first lecture of the year in a few minutes, he stripped off his shirt to see what he could do with it. It turned out that the shirt was unsalvageable, but there was nothing else for him to wear, so he dabbed it with some paper towels and slid the shirt back over his head.

And, he checked his watch, it was time for his first lecture.

<->

When the teenager from before entered the lecture hall, Poe could be forgiven for scowling because the other teenager entered as if he owned the place. Immediately, he didn't like the dark-skinned teenager. It was just the air he gave, as though everything should happen _for_ him just because he went to this university.

Meanwhile there were people, like himself, who had worked their butts off for nights on end to pass the exams in order to receive an offer from university - _any_ university that would accept him and get him out of his house for a reasonable length of time.

He reached into his backpack and brought out a bent, thin-lined notebook and a pencil that had been chewed at the top. He's found that, being left-handed, pencil was better for writing his notes than pen. He always ended up smudging his work if he used a pen.

Poe watched smugly as the guy sat down directly in front of the professor after attempting to find another seat. No one wanted that seat. Served him right for being 'better' than everyone else.

He silently bemoaned his lack of coffee to keep him awake during his first lecture. He was so _tired_ and it wasn't his fault, his Dad had been at him again last night, preventing him from getting a reasonable amount of sleep.

<->

Finn sat on the seat and eagerly looked up to see what the professor was going to begin the year with. Knowing the basic setup of educational facilities, he deduced that it would probably be an introduction to the class followed by an brief overview of the years syllabus.

It was brilliant to be in university, he thought, grasping his pen in his right hand, learning about the classic poetry that had been written hundreds of years ago.

He'd done his adoptive parents proud by getting into university, as had his adoptive sister. It was now up to him to prove that their pride wasn't misplaced.

He had his leather-bound notebook and pen in front of him, ready for taking notes. He only ever took down what the professor was saying, not what was on the slides as he printed those out as soon as the class finished. In fact the only thing that was bothering him was the smell of coffee and the slight dampness of his shirt. He frowned in annoyance as he realised that he would have to stay like this - damp and smelling of coffee - for the rest of the day.

<->

Although he was kind of apprehensive about starting university, Poe had found some friends, though they weren't in his Classical Poetry lecture, but they didn't ask questions about why he was sometimes stiff and looked as though he hadn't had any sleep. Jess and Snap were their names, and the three had bonded over their shared hate of entitled people. Since that initial meeting that occurred sitting on the same bench, muttering about entitled bastards, they were inseparable.

Poe was happy; he'd found some friends.

<->

Despite his sister's urging, Finn hadn't found a particular friend in any of his classes. Sure, he had lots of acquaintances, people he could sit with during breaks and eat with, people who knew his name and smiled and waved when they came across each other within university.

But no, Finn hadn't one actual friend. He decided it was probably for the best, if he wanted to do well at university. He couldn't afford the inevitable distraction of having friends. Not if he wanted to do Han and Leia proud.

<->

Most of his classes were okay, he could cope with the workload, even with his Dad's unpredictable mood swings and drinking habits. Poe's one bad class was his Classical Poetry lecture and this wasn't because of the class or the lecturer - she was actually quite nice. No, it was because of _him_ , Finn Storm. The guy who, Poe quickly realised, he'd spilt coffee all over at the very start of the semester. He always thought that, because he had a more eloquent way of speaking and better note taking materials, he could walk all over Poe.

But Poe soon proved him wrong. Although his arguments weren't as well formulated than Finn's, they often had more emotional depth to them, rather than being cold, hard evaluations.

<->

Finn found that his lectures were not difficult. Yes, they required him to pay attention in lectures and study each night, but that is what he expected from university.

He was enjoying all his lectures. All apart from _one_ \- the Classic Poetry lecture with him, Poe. It drove him insane how the other teenager thought that poetry was all about emotion, not the way the poet wrote the poem.

<->

Finn and Poe were arguing, much to the well concealed amusement of their lecturer. It had been this way ever since they laid eyes on each other in September and realised that they were each other's biggest rival. It was now halfway through November, and their lecturer had not turned away students who were listening, despite them not being in her class. Well, not yet anyway.

"That is _not_ what the poet is trying to imply!" Finn said, scathingly.

"Oh really? Because it seems pretty clear to me that this poem is meant for the poet's loved one." Poe replied, tapping his pencil against the table top. He wanted his rival to see that he was right.

"The poet is clearly not writing about his loved one." Finn said, "Rather, he's discussing his feelings about his childhood home."

Their lecturer spoke in the brief gap before either teen could say anything else to back up their points, "You both have very valid points about this poem. However, I would like to hear _someone else's_ opinion about it for the last half an hour."

As she gestured for someone else to present their opinion on the classic poem and the students not in her class slunk away through the doors, Poe felt Finn's eyes glaring at him from behind and whirled around, snapping, "What is your problem?"

The bastard smiled smugly, "Obviously that you don't know the subject matter as well as you think you do."

Poe fought the urge to rub his forehead with his fingers in an attempt to get rid of his on-coming headache and said, "Really? That's what your problem is? That's a shit reason."

"I do have a problem with it actually." Finn said, haughtily, "If you can't be bothered to learn the material, why are you at university in the first place."

"Fuck you. Not everyone is a nerd in the most basic sense of the word." He replied, pointing at Finn's leather notebook and fancy pen, "Some people, for example _me_ , can have a social life instead of spending all their time on work, which you obviously do."

Before Poe's rival could even open his mouth to argue with him anymore, their lecturer dismissed them a few minutes early. Poe shoved his notebook and pencil into his beat-up backpack, grabbed his leather jacket off his chair and slid it over his shoulders before exiting the room well before his rival.

He smirked. It would take a lot more than saying he didn't do the required reading to get him to drop his point. He did do the required reading, if nothing else, it kept him in his room, away from his Dad.

And he was sure that he'd managed to annoy Finn by saying that he was a nerd.

<->

Finn could see that his rival was smug about getting the last word in before their lecturer let them go for the day. And that irritated him; he wanted to have the last word. Most of the time, he did manage to say a final, cutting remark to Poe, but not today.

He ground his teeth together silently. _Damn that guy!_


	2. 2/6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so glad that people seem to like this story. I'm sorry that it's been almost 3 months to the day that I last updated this fic. But real life got in the way, plus I've decided to do Camp NaNoWriMo in April so... *shrugs*

>   _“People who are filled with hate don't know how to handle love.”  
>  _ **\- P. C. Cast.**

Finn looked around at his adopted family. There was Han Solo and Leia Organa, the kindly couple who had taken him and Rey in. though not at the same time. Rey had been adopted first and then himself, although they were near in age. He couldn’t find any complaints though; he’d just been glad to get out of the care system for good. Their family dog, Chewie, was lying on the carpet with Rey. She was stroking his fluffy ears and talking at him.

It was good to be on Christmas break. It felt like he’d been working non-stop ever since September, ensuring that he – not Poe – was top of the class. It was satisfying to know that he was at the top, with Poe just below him. He smiled.

“What’cha smiling about Finn?” Rey asked, tilting her head towards him.

“Just thinking about how I’m top of my Classical Poetry class.” He replied.

“That’s boring! Don’t you do anything other than study?”

Finn shrugged, careful not to spill his hot chocolate, “Well, I’m at university. What do you expect?”

“For you to have fun!” Rey got up from her place on the carpet and approached him, sitting on the couch next to him. “You can’t spend all your life doing work. You _can_ have fun as well.”

“I know that. I’m just…more comfortable doing my studies.”

“Join a study group then Finn. Sad but still social.” She poked him in the side to emphasise her point.

“I get the point!” Finn assured his adoptive sister. _“Stop poking me!”_

<->

Poe groaned quietly as he dabbed the bleeding cut on the side of his face. It was a good job he didn’t have classes for the next few weeks, it would take time for that to heal fully.

“Fuck.” He muttered, looking at himself in the mirror. He looked a mess. In addition to the cut on his cheek, he had two black eyes and a darkening bruise on the underside of his jaw where he’d – despite knowing better – tried to pry his Dad’s hands off the vodka bottle. It was all his fault, but that didn’t make the pain any less.

Once his bruises were taken care of, he went to his room. There was no lock on his door – his Dad had taken it off years ago – and the bed was only just big enough for him to sleep in, but it was still better than being in the living room, where his could blow up at any given moment about anything.

He settled on his bed, mindful of the bruises covering his torso, and grabbed the book he’d been reading before he’d gone downstairs. He flipped it open and began to read, trying not to think about how tomorrow was Christmas Day. It would be incredibly uncharacteristic of his Dad to get him a present. He could barely remember the last time he’d gotten a Christmas present, which told him it must have been when he was young.

<->

Finn groaned from his place on the floor. Rey had pushed him off his bed.

“Why?” He mumbled, dragging himself off the floor and putting his duvet back on his bed.

“Because it’s Christmas Day!” Rey said excitedly, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him out of his room.

She was _far too_ excited for this time in the morning, he thought. Ok so it was Christmas Day, but that didn’t mean that Rey had to be so _excited_. It was eight o’clock in the morning.

Sleepily, Finn rubbed his face. He wasn’t exactly awake this early in the morning. He blinked as they entered the living room. Leia and Han, looking about as awake as Finn, were waiting next to the Christmas tree. Chewie was chewing on a bond by the sofa. It was what Finn had wanted as a child, family and love more than presents.

“Morning.” Han grumbled, sipping his coffee.

Finn smiled at him even as Rey dragged him to the moderate pile of presents. Finn expected them to be fairly evenly split between him and Rey, as they had been for previous years. It was really special, a bit like what happened on their respective birthdays.

It was going to be a good day, he could feel it.

<->

Poe slammed the front door in his hurry to get the hell out of the house. He cringed as he walked quickly away, knowing that one act would have made his Dad even more mad. He reflected that he’d have even more bruises than he did already when he went back. (He’d have to go back.)

He sighed, well there was one thing for certain; this Christmas was shaping up to be one of the worst in his memory. And that included the year his Dad had been in prison, which had been tough.

He ducked his head against the wind, shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket, and walked down the street, trying not to think about how everyone else had a family and were probably opening presents in warm house. He blinked away the tears that were due to the wind. Obviously.

<->

Finn’s head snapped upwards when their lecturer clapped her hands, thus gaining everyone’s attention.

She smiled widely, “I hope you all had a nice break over Christmas. But we’re here to work now, especially as you have an assignment due in after Easter.” She paused to let the students groan dramatically before continuing. “This task is not one you can do in a night, like I know some of you did on the last assignment. The details will be online before the end of today, but the basics are that you have to write a poem a month until the due date, which is at the end of June. You can choose any topic you like. I’d recommend that you practice, instead of submitting six substandard poems, but I know _some_ of you won’t follow that advice.”

While she had been talking, Finn had jotted down the basics of the assignment – _“6 poems, due June, one/month”_ – on a fresh page in his leather-bound notebook.

<->

Poe didn’t bother to write any notes on the assignment as the lecturer had said it’d be online by the end of today. He knew that he wouldn’t look at it straightaway, but by the end of the week, he would’ve looked at it _and_ wrote his first draft of the poem. Instead, he flipped his pen between his fingers, feeling a sense of satisfaction when Finn turned around to glare at him silently.

He smirked. He loved annoying the other teen, it made Classical Poetry just that much more interesting.

<->

When Finn got home, he locked himself in his room until dinner time and worked feverishly on the first poem he was expected to give in at the end of June. Although he knew that he wasn’t required to do them all at once, - one needed to be written each month after all – he felt that sooner was preferable to rushing at the last minute.

He put pen to paper and began to write. He knew it would take a dozen or so attempts before he reached the poem he would want to submit for his grade. It was just how he worked.

<->

“Poe!” His lecturer called out, just before he was about to disappear out into the hall.

He sighed, he’d been looking forward to having his lunch and having a much needed sit down in a comfy chair. His Dad had been bad yesterday evening, coming home drunk and proceeding to beat the shit out of him, so he was now covered in bruises in hidden places. Even when drunk, his Dad didn’t hit anywhere that could be spotted. It was…a mercy. Sort of.

Poe paused by the door, intending to make a quick getaway once this conversation was over. He smiled, dropping his backpack from his shoulder to the floor with a soft _thump_ , and replied, “Yes?”

She approached him with a piece of paper in her hand, which she gave to him.

He looked down at the paper and read it. It was a poem. A good one. Better than his latest draft of his first poem, which he’d finalised yesterday, after the beating. His handwriting had been _shocking_.

“Who wrote this?” He asked.

“Finn.” His lecturer said, raising an eyebrow.

Poe could almost feel the hairs on the back of his neck rise in annoyance. _Finn Storm_ wrote this?! His rival since the beginning of semester one wrote this – as much as he hated to admit it – really good poem. Poe knew his poems were nowhere near as good as the one in his hands and not just because of the handwriting. It was in the way the subject was described, in the adjectives chosen, the flow of the words overall.

“Can I take this?” Poe asked, wincing slightly as he bent to pick up backpack and slinging it over his shoulder.

“Of course you can.” His lecturer replied, glancing at her watch, “I need to be going now. But I’ll see you in our next lecture?”

“Sure.”

As she walked away, Poe rubbed his forehead with his spare hand, staring at the stupidly good poem in his other. What was he going to do about this?

<->

Finn was not expecting to be ambushed by his rival on his way to the university library. But here he was, staring into the brown of Poe Dameron’s eyes.

“What do you want?” He snapped, pushing Poe’s hands off him and retrieving his bag from where it had fallen on the floor.

Poe grimaced and shoved a piece of paper at him, “Here.”

Finn took the paper off him and recognised his own handwriting immediately. He stared hard at his rival, “Where did you get this?”

Poe took a few steps back, “Our lecturer gave it to me. I didn’t get it by other means.”

“Right.”

It was quiet between the two rivals as Finn tried to figure out what the other teenager’s purpose was. He didn’t think that he’d seen Poe here before.

“Why are you here?” He wasn’t going to use the other teen’s name; they weren’t _friends_.

Finn watched with interest as his rival scuffed his shoes against the concrete, looking down at them before sighing and replying.

“I want to know if you could help me improve my poems.”

He laughed, shocked, “I’m sorry. _What?_ ”

“I want your help with poems.” Poe grit out, like it hurt him to say it.

Finn tapped his finger against his chin, “And why should I do that?”

“Because your poem is good – really good.”

“You really think that?”

Poe nodded furiously, “Yes, it really good honestly.”

“Ok then. But you’ve got to take this seriously – no missing sessions just because you can go out with your friends or because you’re tired.”

“I – ok.”

“And now, I need to go.” Finn brushed past Poe, who was looking at him with an open mouth.

As he entered the library, swiping his university card to get through the barriers, Finn wondered why he’d decided to help his sworn rival and why Poe was only just approaching him now. They’d had the assignment for just over two weeks. Why now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m aware that there’s a lot of time skips in this chapter. I haven’t forgot about this fic and idea. I still love it.


	3. 3/6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for not updating this more often, but life has been crazy. I’ve finished my first year at Uni and got a summer job, so I’ve been busy. Still, enjoy!

>   _“Nobody likes being alone that much. I don't go out of my way to make friends, that's all.”  
>  _ **\-  Haruki Murakami, _Norwegian Wood_.**

Finn tapped his pen against the side of the table quietly, feeling annoyed. His rival was late – by fifteen minutes. He debated leaving, but quickly put that idea aside. He could admit to himself that he was curious as to what Poe had written already and wanted to judge why it was inferior to his own work.

He looked up from his notebook at the noise of a backpack being dumped on the floor.

“Nice of you to turn up.” He sneered, as his rival fished through his back, retrieving his notebook and pencil.

“S’not my fault.” Poe muttered, “Lecturer wanted a word with me.”

“Right…”

<->

Poe could tell that the dark-skinned teen didn’t believe him. He didn’t care. They weren’t here to be friends; they were here to work. He pushed his dislike for Finn aside for the moment and hoped that his rival would do the same.

“So, have you at least got a theme for your poems?” Finn asked, raising an eyebrow.

Poe nodded, “Yeah, love.”

His rival snorted disbelievingly, “Right. So _you’re_ going to write beautiful poems about love? Ones about how lovely it is to love a girl and have her love you back?”

Poe almost growled; why couldn’t Finn just leave their animosity to one side for a bit? He silently wondered why he’d ever asked for this conceited douchebag’s help. Oh yeah, Finn’s poems were pretty decent. Better than his own, though it hurt his pride to admit it.

“Can’t you act civil towards me for now?” Poe snapped, anger coursing through his veins, “Seriously, is it that hard for you to be nice to someone who you don’t like or respect?”

“I thought I was doing a good job to be honest.” Finn replied coolly, tapping his pen against the table, “Since you’ve _oh so kindly_ asked for me to be civil with you, I think the easiest thing for me to do is to be quiet.”

“Are you five years old?”

“No, but I have a feeling that everything I say will end up irritating you.”

Poe sighed internally; this was childish. He’d thought that Finn would take this seriously.

“Why are you being so childish?” He asked, irritated.

“Because,” Finn said slowly, “I think your poem theme is terrible. Love is so cliché.”

“No. It isn’t.” Poe said, “There’s more than romantic love you know. There’s love for your friends, family.”

“Right, yeah sure.”

<->

Finn thought that Poe’s theme was more that cliché – he thought it was weak. Anyone could write a poem about love. _He_ could write a poem about love. He wasn’t going to, but he could if he wanted to. And it’d be better than anything Poe would ever write.

“I can tell you don’t believe me.”

“Oh no,” Finn said sarcastically, “Could you tell?”

“Oh fuck you.” Poe replied.

He didn’t take Poe’s comment personally as he didn’t think that Poe meant it. He assumed it was just a way for the other teenager to express his disgruntlement. After a few minutes of quiet, Finn decided to take the initiative and begin a useful conversation.

<->

Finn leaned back on his desk chair, reflecting on their first meeting. Which hadn’t been a total disaster. They’d argued, but he’d expected that – they argued in every single lecture they’d shared since the beginning of September. Why would their meeting be any different? However, after their rocky start, Finn had been surprised to find that the ideas Poe had were not completely terrible, even if he did think that the theme could be better.

<->

“If the two of you can’t _not_ argue, then I’m going to kick you out!” The irate librarian said, hands on her hips, glaring down at Poe and Finn.

“It was all him, I’ll try to get him to be quieter.” Poe said, grinning at Finn’s outraged face. He _really_ wished he had a camera on him, the expression on his rival’s face was priceless.

“What?! No it was not!” Finn protested, all but slamming his pen down on the table top, “It was all _your_ fault Poe! You said that my ideas were invalid because they’re from a different viewpoint.”

“I never said that. I just said that maybe your theme could do with some more thought behind it.”

Finn scoffed, “This is coming from the guy who’s writing his poems about love – the most cliché topic in literature!”

“And your point is…”

“ _Right!_ You two out!” The librarian cut into their debate, “ _Now!_ ”

“But…” Finn said.

“No buts!”

Poe stifled a laugh as he gathered his notebook and pencil, stuffing them in his backpack in one smooth move. He’d had much practice in getting out of places quickly, probably too much, if he was being honest with himself. But he shook himself, it wouldn’t do to be thinking like that now. Not when they had to figure out somewhere else to meet up.

<->

“Now what are we meant to do?” Finn asked, shivering in the cold February air, despite his thick winter coat. He didn’t understand how Poe wasn’t shaking with cold, seeing as the teenager had only a thin jacket on.

“Find somewhere else I suppose.” Poe replied, shrugging, “Because there’s no way that the librarian will let us back in.”

“Well, we could always go back to my place.” Finn suggested, adjusting his backpack straps on his shoulders, “My family will be there, but they won’t bother us. Though Chewie might.”

“Who’s Chewie?”

“Our dog.”

Poe shrugged, “It beats going to my house. Let’s go.”

Finn began to lead the way to his house.

<->

Poe tried not to be obvious in his admiration of Finn’s house, but he couldn’t stop the gasp that spilled out of him when they walked down the driveway towards the house. It was fucking _huge_! He’d bet that Finn’s family could go an entire week without seeing each other. His house was way too small for him and his Dad to do that, besides there wasn’t a door to his bedroom that he could lock. There was also the fact that his Dad liked to beat him up after he got drunk.

“Impressed?” Finn said as they approached the main door.

Poe turned to him with wide eyes, “Just a little bit.”

Finn laughed, “You know this is the first time I’ve brought anyone home.”

“Seriously?!”

“Yeah.” Finn said as he opened the door, “Really.”

“I’m not surprised. You _are_ a nerd.”

“Shut up.”

<->

Finn was pleasantly surprised when Poe introduced himself to Han, Leia and Rey without insulting him. He could tell that his family wanted more information as to why he’d invited his rival over, but he wasn’t going to go into that while Poe was still here and expecting help with his own poems.

“Let’s go to my room and work on your poem.” He said, before Rey could start talking to Poe about anything.

Poe nodded and gestured for him to lead the way. Finn went up the wide set of stairs, to the first floor, and then turned left down the hall. About halfway down, he stopped and opened a blue door on the left side. He entered, leaving his backpack next to the door, and sat down on his desk chair, pushing himself around to face the door. He then realised that Poe was still lurking in the doorway.

“Come in then.” Finn said, thinking that maybe Poe was waiting for permission to enter his room.

He watched as Poe took a tentative step into his bedroom and looked around in awe.

“Shit.” Poe said in an undertone, “This is a _really_ nice room.”

“Thanks, I suppose?” Finn replied, turning back around to his desk, where everything was in meticulous order. Everything had a place and everything was in its place. He found an organized desk helped when it came to doing university work.

<->

Poe moved over and sat gingerly down on the edge of the double bed nearest the desk. He was slightly intimidated by the sheer size of Finn’s bedroom; at the very least, it had to be twice as big as Poe’s room, if not bigger. The walls were a pale blue, which matched the bedspread and pillowcases, and the blinds and wardrobe were white. This made Poe think of blue skies with fluffy white clouds, which could be the intention. The room was very tidy, which was the complete opposite to Poe’s tiny room.

He dropped his beat-up backpack next the Finn’s bed and opened it, digging in it for a pencil and notebook. Placing them on his knees, Poe glanced up at Finn to find he was doing a similar thing.

“Shall we get started?” Poe said, flipping his pencil between his fingers.

“Sure,” Finn uncapped his pen and opened his notebook, “We’ll start by going through your latest poem and identifying the issues.”

“How dare you?!” Poe said jokingly, “There are no problems with my poems!”

His reaction had the intended effect – it made Finn laugh. Even after only three meetings, they were getting along slightly better, thought they still argued in lectures.

<->

Just before Poe left, Finn had a brainwave. He pulled the dark-haired teen to one side, away from the main door. He took his phone out of his pocket in anticipation.

“Yes?” Poe said expectantly.

“I just realised, we should probably swap numbers.” Finn explained earnestly, brown eyes fixed on Poe’s, “So we can arrange our meetings more effectively.”

Poe dug into his pocket and pulled out his phone, unlocking it and handing it to Finn. He said, “Huh. That makes sense.”

Even as he inputted his number into Poe’s phone, Finn responded, “Are you implying that I don’t make sense the rest of the time?”

“Obviously not.”

“You liar.”

Poe took his phone back and put it back in his jacket packet. He took Finn’s phone off him and typed his number in.

“All sorted.” Poe said, grinning as Finn opened the main door, “I’ll see you at uni.”

“Expect you will.” Finn replied, waving as Poe walked out into the bitter cold.

He stayed there, door open, letting all the cold air in, until Poe vanished from sight. Only then did he shut the front door and go upstairs to his room.

<->

Poe returned home to find that his Dad snoring on the couch. He took his worn shoes off and tiptoed through the living room to the kitchen, where he quickly and silently made himself a sandwich. Sandwich in hand, he made his way upstairs to the relative safety of his room.

He sighed as he let his backpack fall to the floor with a soft thud. He wished that his life was different, but it wasn’t, and all he could do was weather the storm. He began to eat his sandwich, thumbing through his phone to see if anyone had contacted him while he’d been at Finn’s house. No one had, which was not unsurprising, given that Jess and Snap were busy with their own university work.

“Poe! Get down here!”

He gulped and went downstairs, knowing without a doubt that the only way he’d be getting back upstairs would be by crawling, slowly and painfully.

<->

Finn’s phone buzzed at about half past ten. He put his pen down and reached for it, unlocking it with his thumb. It’s Poe. He opened it with a single swipe.

The text read: **I’m bored.**

Finn looked at it and wondered _why_ Poe had chosen to text him of all people. Surely the other teenager had friends? Nevertheless, he found himself texting back.

_Why am I not surprised?_

Three texts came in quick succession.

**I don’t wanna work.**   
**I can’t sleep either.**   
**It fucking sucks.**

Finn texted: _Why are you texting me?_

**Cause ur a nerd and I’m booooorrrrreeeeddd.**

_God, you’re like a child._

**Expected anything else?**

_No, not really._

After that, Poe’s texts stopped. Finn figured he’d fallen asleep, despite his admission that he couldn’t sleep, and put his phone away so he could focus on his work. He’d do his work until Han or Leia told him to go to bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the last bit: italics are Finn and bold is Poe. Comments are brilliant to me!


	4. 4/6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to reiterate: the bold is Poe and the italics are Finn. Enjoy this chapter!

> _“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him.”_  
>  **\- Orson Scott Card, _Ender’s Game._**

Poe had plenty of reasons to dislike or even hate Finn – he had a family that obviously cared about him, he had a really nice house – but he…just _couldn’t_. Not when they seemed to be tentative friends and could talk about things other than poetry. They weren’t as close as he was to Snap and Jess, but they were friends. (And if he dreamed about being more than friends, well that was his business.)

His phone buzzed in his pocket. He fished it out and unlocked it.

_The usual place at 5PM?_

**Coffee shop?**

_Yes. See you there._

Poe never thought Finn would text during lectures or seminars, but here he was, receiving texts from Finn in the middle of his seminar. If nothing else, meeting with Finn gave him an excuse to avoid going home for a while longer.

<->

It was the end of February and yet Finn still needed his thick coat to keep warm. He was waiting outside for Poe to arrive so they could carry on with improving Poe’s poems. Though he’d disagree if anyone asked him, Finn felt like he and Poe were friends. Maybe not particularly _close_ friends, friends who still argued during lectures, but friends nonetheless. Not that he was informing Poe of this.

“You know you can go inside right?” A voice said from behind him, “It’s much warmer.”

“Poe.” Finn said, turning around to find Poe dressed in his usual thin jacket and backpack over one shoulder, “You’re here.”

“Course I am. I said I’d be here.” Poe replied, grabbing Finn by the arm and dragging him in the direction of the coffee shop.

He didn’t attempt to shrug Poe’s hand off his arm until they were entering the coffee shop. Was this what it was like to have friends? He wondered as he ordered his coffee.

<->

After digging through his pockets for enough change to pay for his large coffee, Poe followed Finn through the maze of haphazardly placed tables to their ‘usual’ table at the very back of the dimly lit coffee shop. He dumped his backpack on the spare chair next to him and set his coffee down on the table, taking care not to spill any. He had a feeling that the caffeine would be much needed once he and Finn got to work. Plus, he hadn’t got much sleep the previous night, which had been partly due to his Dad and partly down to his own brain, which had decided to torture him with dreams of him and Finn. It’d given him a heavy feeling in his stomach when he’d first woken up.

Poe slumped into his seat and dug into his backpack to find his notebook and pencil. He placed these items on the table and took a sip of his coffee, appreciating the warmth that spread down his throat. His jacket was way too thin to be much use against the cold, but it was the only one he had, so he had to make do. It wasn’t like his Dad was going to willingly spend money that could be used to buy alcohol on his own son’s health and wellbeing.

He flipped to the correct page, the one with the poem that had been inspired by Finn, and pushed it towards the teenager opposite him. He didn’t think that Finn would ever figure out that he was writing about _him_. And that was the way it was staying.

While he waited for Finn’s commentary, Poe nervously took a sip of his coffee. It’d be great if Finn actually _liked_ this poem, specially seeing as it was about him. He wasn’t going to hold his breath though.

<->

Finn scanned the page quickly, taking note of the verbs and nouns used, as well as paying attention to the flow of the poem as a whole. He was aware of Poe waiting with bated breath for his commentary and thought that he better put the other teenager out of his misery before he passed out.

“Well, this isn’t bad. It’s better than what you were give me since we started these sessions.” Finn said, taking in the way Poe’s shoulders sagged in relief, “However, you _have_ made some key errors.”

“Y-yeah? Like what?”

He pointed to the second line in the first part of Poe’s poem, explaining that he could have used a better verb and thus made it flow better with the rest of the poem. He then moved onto the rest of the poem, taking care to make sure that Poe understood what he was saying. They’d had a few moments early on where Finn thought he was explaining himself adequately, only for Poe to then ask what he’d been going on about.

Finn wasn’t oblivious, he clearly saw how, after each suggestion he gave Poe regarding the poem, the dark-haired teenager’s scowl deepened, making his eyebrows furrow further and further down on his forehead. Really. And he accused Finn of being childish.

He pushed the notebook towards Poe, only to have it snatched out of his way.

<->

The more Finn explained what was wrong with his poem, the more Poe wanted to hit him. By the time Finn finished, Poe was practically vibrating with anger. He seized the notebook out of Finn’s hands and flipped the cover closed, so no one else could see the pathetic declaration of hope for a relationship with the other teenager. He shoved it and his pencil back into his backpack. He’d barely been here an hour and even though he knew the only place he had to go was back to his Dad, he was leaving. He couldn’t stand to be near Finn any longer.

“Where are you going?” Poe heard Finn ask as he left ‘their’ table.

The air outside was cool on his hot cheeks. He couldn’t believe that he’d bared his feelings to Finn and the other boy had just pointed out all the faults, which to be fair were there, but still. It hurt.

<->

What the _hell_ had just happened? Poe had just stormed off and Finn couldn’t figure out why. Sure, he’d criticised Poe’s poem, but that was the whole point of their meetings. It helped Poe improve his poems, so he wouldn’t fail their assignment. Plus, he hadn’t done it in a mean way, just matter of fact. He hoped that in doing that, he hadn’t ruined their friendship forever. Because that’s what they were, friends. Even if neither of them had voiced it out loud, there were friends.

<->

He and Finn hadn’t talked since their fifth meeting, when Poe had oh so maturely stormed out of the coffee shop. They hadn’t texted either, Poe didn’t want to apologize simply because doing so would mean he’d have to explain _why_ he stormed out. It was now the beginning of March, and the deadline was drawing steadily closer. Poe didn’t want his grade suffering because of the feelings towards Finn that had crept up on him.

He had to grow up and apologise. He’d apologise in their next shared lecture.

<->

Finn walked into his Classical Poetry lecture, taking his usual seat directly in front of Poe. To begin with, he’d sat here just to annoy his former rival, but it had turned into his unofficial seat. He unzipped his bag and reached into it, retrieving his leather notebook and his pen. A shadow fell over his seat, he looked up. It was Poe, who he hadn’t seen since their last meeting near the end of February.

“Hey Poe,” He said, smiling, “What’s up?”

Poe shuffled his feet and mumbled unintelliably.

“What?”

“I just wanted to apologise for…leaving you.” Poe said lowly, “I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s fine. Though I’m a bit confused as to why you ran off.”

“Sorry,” Poe rubbed the back of his neck, “I was having a bad day.”

“Ok. That makes sense.” Finn noticed that their lecturer was setting up for today’s lecture. “You better sit down.”

Poe glanced behind him, “Hm. You’re right. Do you mind?”

“Not at all.” Finn replied as Poe slide into the seat next to him.

It felt like something important had happened.

<->

As Finn entered the kitchen, Chewie bounded over. He dropped his bag on the floor and knelt to greet the dog. He scratched the big dog behind the ears, smiling when the dog opened its mouth and stuck its tongue out. Almost as an afterthought, he greeted Rey, “How was your day?”

She looked up from the homework that she was doing on the kitchen table, “It was good. How about you?”

“It was…strange.”

“How so?”

“In my last lecture, Poe apologised to me for storming off during our last meeting. It was weird and I don’t understand why he stormed off in the first place.” Finn said, his eyebrows drawing together in confusion.

Rey pushed her homework to one side and gestured for him to sit down. He did so, looking at her questioningly.

“Well, what were you doing before Poe stormed off?” She asked.

Finn frowned in thought before saying, “I was critiquing his poem, which is how every meeting starts and then we usually move on to how to improve his poem. Except this time we didn’t get to that part because he snatched the poem off me and then left.”

“What was the poem about?”

“It was about…love and romance, as usual.” Finn explained, thinking carefully about what he’d seen of the poem before Poe had snatched it away, “Except, this time it seemed to be from the point of view of someone pining for their love but knowing that it’d never happen.”

“Huh. That’s interesting. You say that his previous poems were never as specific?”

He shook his head, “Yeah, they were more general, about family love and the love between friends.”

Rey suddenly burst into laughter, startling Chewie, who had just settled back down in his basket.

“What? Why are you laughing?!”

She continued laughing for a few more minutes before catching her breathe and calming down. Rey wiped her eyes to get rid of the tears of laughter that had formed and said, incredulously, “You had no idea?!”

“No idea about what?” Finn was beginning to get worried, given how much his sister had laughed.

“No idea about how Poe has fallen in love with you?”

He felt stunned. “W-what?”

Rey repeated it, “Poe is in love with you Finn.”

“No, no. that’s not right. We’re friends.” Finn shook his head, trying to convince himself, “Nothing else.”

“Right.” She raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

“It’s not – we’re not like that. He’s my _friend_.”

“Only took you a month and a half to come to _that_ realisation.”

“Shut up!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I apologise for the wait in this chapter, but I’ve stumbled into a new fandom, Spider-Man: Homecoming, in the past few months. Whoops?


	5. 5/6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Err… one thing I *definitely* haven’t done is join The Musketeers and the Merlin fandoms…
> 
> Also for the text messages in this chapter: the bold is Poe and the italics are Finn.

>    _“You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.”_  
>  **\- Albus Dumbledore, _Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix._**

“I just want to make them proud, you know?” Finn said, twisting his pen between his fingers, “They’ve done so much for me – and Rey – over the years. They deserve something for all their hard work. I feel like it’s my turn.”

Poe leant back in his chair, saying, “I must admit I have no idea what you’re talking about. I don’t think my Dad would be proud of me no matter what I did.”

“How come?”

Poe was suddenly intensely aware of the bruises that littered his body, going from his legs up to just below his neck, from last night’s beating. He shrugged, “I just get that feeling from him.”

“I’m sure if you talked to him…”

Poe laughed bitterly, hating that he had to hide this from his friend, even though he knew it was for the best. Then again, it wasn’t the _only_ thing he was hiding from Finn.

“Yeah, that’s not likely to happen any time soon.”

<->

Finn wanted to know more about why Poe was unwilling to talk to his father, but something in Poe’s eyes told him not to press the subject. Instead, he asked the other teenager what he wanted to do when he finished university.

Poe was quick to answer, saying, “Get out of town.”

“Why?” Finn said, “Surely it’s not so bad to stay here.”

“Maybe for you, but for me…”

“Poe?” He tilted his head to the side.

“It’s just better for me if I get the hell away from my alcoholic of a Dad. Trust me.”

“Ok…” Finn felt like there was something going on in Poe’s household, maybe even something _bad_ , but there was nothing he could do about it when – more like _if_ – Poe ever confided in him.

Even having just under a month to digest the news that Poe loved him, according to Rey at any rate, Finn still couldn’t get his head around it. Why him? Why not anybody else? Surely there were other people out that had more going for them.

Finn suddenly remembered what Poe had said, “Wait, your Dad is an alcoholic?”

Poe looked away from him, “Yeah, has been since my Mum died. It’s no big deal.”

He frowned at the dark-haired teen, trying to think of something comforting to say and failing.

“I’m…sorry.”

“Don’t be. It happened years ago. I hardly remember her.”

<->

His Dad was in a particularly bad mood today, so Poe had to deal with the consequences. He’d woken up early to complete the poem he’d stared the previous night, knowing that the anniversary of his Mum’s death was coming up, and that meant his Dad would be even worse than usual.

Sure enough, when he creeped downstairs, his Dad was waiting for him. The bottles surrounding the man spoke enough about what he’d been doing all night.

“Hi Dad.” Poe said, knowing what was going to happen. He was suddenly very glad that he’d arranged to meet Finn at the end of his street rather than his house.

Poe’s Dad snarled and approached him, his hands curling into fists at his sides. Poe tried not to flinch as the first punch went straight into his stomach, already tender from previous beatings.

<->

Finn shivered despite his thick coat as he waited for Poe to appear. He didn’t understand why Poe hadn’t invited to meet up at his house, rather than on a street corner. Maybe it had something to do with Poe’s Dad being an alcoholic, which, yeah, made sense now that he’d thought about it.

Perhaps Poe was ashamed of the state of his house, because there would undoubtedly be bottles of alcohol everywhere, plus the general untidiness of two people living together without anyone possessing a desire to clean. But maybe he shouldn’t be so quick to judge.

“Finn!”

He looked up from the pavement, unaware when he’d dropped his head, and found Poe walking towards him, thin jacket on and backpack over one shoulder. Poe was smiling widely, which was usual. What was unusual was the way Finn’s stomach flipped when he saw the smile. He pushed the feeling to one side and focused on greeting Poe.

“Hey Poe!” He said, unable to stop the grin that formed on his face, “How are you?”

Poe stopped when he was directly in front of Finn and he was still smiling. It was becoming quite distracting, if Finn was being honest.

“I’m good and I’ve got an idea where we’re going to go for our meeting today.”

<->

It was quite a nice day, even with the weak sun and a bitterly cold wind. Poe was glad to out of his house. He kind of already knew that Finn wasn’t going to like his idea of not doing work, but he needed a break. Especially when his body hurt as much as it currently did, new bruises forming over old. His very muscles felt sore and he didn’t think he could concentrate on anything for more than five minutes, if that.

With this in mind, Poe began to walk down the street, towards his main hideout when his Dad got to be too much. It was where he spent some of Christmas Day after his Dad had beaten him up.

“This isn't the way to the café.” Finn stated after a few minutes of walking, “Where are we going?”

He glanced sideways, soaking in the sight of Finn like it was the last time he’d ever see the other teenager again, and replied, “A place where I go.”

Finn obviously wanted more information on where he was leading him, but Poe refused to give it, knowing without a doubt his hideout would be best as a surprise. Not that he’d ever taken Jess or Snap up there, they were his friends, yes, but they didn’t mean as much to him as Finn now did.

<->

Irritatingly, Poe wouldn't answer any of his questions about where they were going, so Finn was stuck following the dark-haired teenager out to the outskirts of town. He grumbled to himself, aware of Poe laughing almost silently at him, as they climbed up the small hill which overlooked their town.

When they reached the top, he’d expected it to be exposed and cold from the wind, but instead it…wasn’t. Finn looked around, finding it was surrounded on almost all sides by trees which blocked the wind, making Poe’s place almost peaceful, even if he could still hear the wind whistling through the trees.

“Wow.” He murmured, turning on the spot and dropping his bag on the ground, “This is cool.”

“I’m glad you like it.”

Finn thought that Poe seemed pleased that he liked it, which was a little bit confusing, but then he guessed sharing important and precious things was a key thing in any friendship, let alone when you loved someone. He assumed, he didn’t really know about having friends seeing as he hadn’t exactly been very social when he was younger, despite Rey and Leia’s encouragement.

Turning to face Poe, he found the other teenager sitting on a rock near the edge of the cliff. However, before he headed over to Poe, Finn took a moment just to admire the scenery, which definitely didn’t include how pretty Poe looked when the wind was blowing his hair all over the place and the way he seemed so at peace in this place. But he tried not to focus on that as he picked his bag up and went to sit by Poe, who was focused on the horizon.

“I take it we’re not doing any work today?” He said, leaning back on his hands.

“No, we’re not.” Poe replied, glancing at him, “I need a break from the assignment. I’ve got a lot going on.”

“What do you mean?”

<->

Poe shifted uncomfortably; he’d never mentioned his troubles at home with his Dad to Jess or Snap. For some reason though, he _wanted_ to tell Finn about his problems and his successes. (He knew the reason, of course he did, but that didn’t make it any less off putting.) He _wanted_ to know about Finn’s successes and issues. He knew some things – like he and Rey were adopted siblings, but Finn didn’t love her any less for that, and that he really loved the course he was doing – but he wanted to know more, he wanted to know _everything_ about Finn. Though, not in a creepy way.

“Many things.” He finally said, awkwardly aware that several minutes had passed since Finn’s question.

“That’s not an answer Poe.”

Of course Finn would see straight through his answer. Typical. He now had to – _wanted to_ – tell Finn the truth about his home life and he had no way of knowing what his reaction would be.

“I know, I know…” He scrubbed at his hair, avoiding Finn’s piercing gaze, “It’s just… I’ve never told anyone this before.”

Finn was surprisingly quiet for a few moments before he said, carefully, as if he was considering his words before he said them, “Just because I asked the question, doesn’t mean that you have to answer it.”

“I want to, it’s just a difficult matter.” Poe sighed, closing his eyes and blurting, “This is my hideout from my Dad.”

“Hideout from your Dad?”

“Yeah, he has this…habit of punching me when he’s pissed. It’s not fun, but it’s what happens. It might have something to do with the fact that my Mum died when I was born, so he blames me for that.” He said, twisting his hands, “Fun times at the Dameron household.”

“Your – your Dad hits you?!” Finn said, a tone of distress clear in his voice.

<->

Finn was shocked and horrified by Poe’s confession. He had no idea what to say; he’d never been in a situation remotely like this before. (Probably because he hadn’t had friends before Poe, at least not any close ones.)

“Yeah… and now I’ve made you uncomfortable and you don’t know what to say.” Poe rambled, his hands fidgeting in his lap, “This is why I haven’t told anybody else. Dammit.”

He knew he had to say _something_ before Poe worked himself any more than he already had. Carefully, he placed a hand on Poe’s arm, all too aware of how warm his hand was compared Poe’s arm even with his jacket on.

"Poe." He said, stopping his friends' ramble before he can say anything else, "I'm glad that you told me. I'm not sure what I can do for you beyond inviting you to stay with me for a few nights. But I _will_ be there for you, just text me. I don’t care what time it is or what I'm doing, I will respond or meet up or whatever you want to do."

Finn saw the blush rise on Poe's cheeks and thought that it was quite an appealing look on the other teenager. He wanted to see more of it and be the cause of it.

"Finn - thanks. I mean that." Poe said quietly, glancing at him before focusing his attention on the horizon.

Finn let go of Poe's arm, regretting that he had to do so just a little bit, and turned so he was also facing the slowly descending sun. He wasn't sure when the afternoon had turned to almost sunset, but it had.

<->

Poe felt lighter after telling Finn his big secret. Well, the one that wasn't about his love for Finn. He could breathe easier now, knowing that he could talk to Finn whenever he needed to. Going back home didn't seem as terrible as it would've been had Finn not accepted what he'd said as the truth.

"The sunset's beautiful, don’t you think?" Finn said.

Poe blinked and looked at Finn, gazing uninterrupted as the golden light played over his dark skin. _You are beautiful_ , he thought while verbally replying, "Yeah, without a doubt."

<->

"Maybe you change this," Finn pointed at the offending word on the second line of Poe's latest poem, "The rest of it could stay more or less the same."

Poe had met up with Finn at their usual coffee shop for their meeting. Finn had beaten him there for once and had brought them two coffees, which had caused the stray thought of how this was like a date. This in turn had caused him to have a little daydream about what it would be like to go on a date with Finn.

Once Poe had made the changes which Finn had recommended, he asked, "Do you know how it became May?"

Finn laughed, his head tipping back and exposing the long line of his throat, "No, I don't and if I'm being honest, I'm going to ignore it until it becomes a problem."

"Such a healthy attitude." Poe replied, grinning, "But seriously, I have no idea how it became May already. Like, wasn't it only just turning March the other week?"

"I thought as much."

<->

Finn was sat at his desk, working on his poems for the assignment. He was guilty of focusing on helping Poe with his poems and other problems, as a result he had got behind on his own poems. But it wasn’t too bad – they still had just over a month before they had to submit anything. He could easily catch up to where he should be.

Thinking about Poe made him wonder how today was. He hadn’t seen the other teen due to having a day off from university today. It’d been a welcome change, however he was concerned about Poe. If he’d had the same day off, would that mean that Poe’s Dad would’ve taken advantage of that?

Sighing, Finn decided that his work was not the most important thing at this very moment. Finding out how Poe was. He dropped the pen and picked up his phone, opening the text messages and sending one to Poe. Less than a minute later, he had a response.

**Not 2 bad 2bh. U?**

_I’ve been good. How’s your Dad been?_

**Not great, but not the worst.**

_That’s good to hear._

**Rlly???**

Finn paused before texting back, he’d admitted to himself and Rey that Poe was a friend – his _only_ friend in fact – but he hadn’t actually told Poe himself. Now was as good a time as any. He took a breath and blew it out slowly before typing the text.

_You’re my friend you know? The only one._

**Seriously? You don’t have *any* other friends?**

_No, unless Rey counts._

**She’s ur sis tho she cld be ur friend 2 I gess.**

_Ok, your point is made. Why are you still awake?_

**Working on poems. Y r u awake???**

_I’m also working on the poems due in a month. I’m afraid I sort of neglected them while I was helping you._

**Huh.**

Finn didn’t receive another text from Poe after that, so he went back to his poems for a while before going to bed.

<->

Poe’s phone buzzed in his pocket. He retrieved it, opening it by sliding his finger across the touchscreen. It was a text from Finn.

_Where are you? We were meant to meet at the coffee shop._

He would never get over how formally Finn texted. It was maybe the reason he took joy in texting him back in terrible text speak.

**I’m @ the hide out.**

_Ok. I’ll see you there._

**G8.**

Fifteen minutes later, Finn was sitting next to him, also admiring the view.

“It’s gorgeous, isn’t it?” Finn said.

“Yeah, it is.”

“Why didn’t you meet me at the coffee shop?” His friend asked after a few minutes of peacefulness.

Poe shrugged, “Didn’t feel like working today.”

“Fair enough.”

Poe was glad Finn was here, he’d been having a bit of a tough day, but meeting with Finn always put him in a good mood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ended up longer than I expected it to...
> 
> Uni work has caught up with me I'm afraid, which means that I don't think I'll be able to update the last chapter anytime soon. Never fear though, I'll keep working on it and I'll post it as soon as it's done.


	6. 6/6.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter; I just hope I did it justice.

> _“Hate is... It's too easy. Love. Love takes courage.”  
> _ **\- Hannah Harrington, _Speechless._**

Poe put his pencil down and looked at the piece of paper on the table, sighing quietly. He was waiting for Finn to arrive at their typical coffee shop and had decided to finish off his latest poem. It was different because it was completely clear who his feelings were for and who he was writing these poems for. All Poe knew was that Finn was straight and he’d never love him back as he did. He’d have to accept that he and Finn would only be friends and nothing more, even if that thought hurt his heart.

He felt tears start to build in the corners of his eyes and as they began to drip down his cheeks, he was abruptly glad he’d chosen a seat at the very back of the coffee shop, facing towards the wall. He didn’t think he could take the humiliation of being _seen_ crying in public by a stranger; it was bad enough he was crying in public.

“Hey Poe, you’re – why are you crying?” Finn sounded alarmed, which Poe thought was understandable, seeing as the other teenager had just unexpectedly come across his friend crying in a coffee shop. Finn sat down next to him after placing his bag on the table and shifting his chair closer to Poe, near enough that Poe could feel the body heat radiating from Finn. It was comforting to know that Finn was there as a friend, even if they’d never be anything else.

“N-nothing.” Poe said, wiping his eyes hurriedly with the sleeve of his hoodie and then putting on a fake smile, “I’m fine.”

Finn raised his eyebrows in disbelief and replied, “Right. That’s why you’re crying in a coffee shop.”

“Mmhm.”

<->

Finn didn’t believe Poe in the slightest; there had to be _something_ wrong if he was crying. He looked down and then spotted a piece of paper in front of Poe. Maybe this would shed some light on why Poe was crying.

He gestured at the paper, asking, “Can I have a look?”

Poe glanced at the paper in question and then shrugged, handing it over, “May as well. Not like it’s gonna make any difference.”

Finn was curious about his friend’s last statement but decided not to ask, instead he read the poem, thinking that maybe reading it would provide him with some answers. He spent a few minutes going over the poem, carefully taking in each and every word. It was much sadder than Poe’s previous poems, but it didn’t have any technical issues that he could see.

“It’s…good. There’s no reason to cry Poe. This is probably one of the best poems you’ve written.” He said, suddenly aware that Poe’s emotional defences were probably lower than usual and the last thing he wanted was to cause Poe to start crying again.

A weak smile formed on Poe’s face as he replied, “T-thanks Finn.”

<->

Despite the weather taking a turn for the better, it was still bitterly cold outside when the sun dropped below the horizon. Even with the wind that was blowing fiercely, Poe didn’t regret his decision to leave his house and by extension, his Dad. He was _glad_ to be out of the house, at least out here he wouldn’t be beaten to within an inch of his life just for being there, but he did wish that he had somewhere to go. Wait, couldn’t he go to Finn’s house? Would that be possible, given that it was past midnight already? There was only one way to find out.

Poe’s hands shook with the cold as he got his phone out of his jacket pocket, unlocking it and calling Finn in one quick motion. It rang and rang until Poe had begun to think that maybe this was a bad idea. Then Finn picked up.

_“Hello?”_

“Hey Finn,” Poe said, twisting his fingers into his jacket pocket, “Just wondering if I could stay the night?”

_“Poe. Where are you now?”_

“Down the street from my house. Why?”

Poe thought that Finn sounded slightly more awake when he replied, _“Come to my house. I’ll let you in.”_

He grinned in the darkness as he started walking to Finn’s house; Finn was a true friend.

<->

To say that Finn was surprised to be woken up by his mobile in the middle of the night would have been an understatement. But because it was Poe, he answered even if he was more than half-asleep and discovered that his friend (maybe more?) was on the streets at past midnight.

By the time, Finn had shuffled downstairs in his pyjamas – whispering “It’s just me, calm down boy,” to Chewie to keep him quiet – Poe had appeared at the door. He let the other teenager in, taking careful note of how much Poe was shivering, even taking into account the walk here.

“Hi Finn.” Poe said quietly, his eyes focusing on the floor by Finn’s bare feet.

“Poe, let’s get you upstairs yeah?”

“Are you sure this is ok?”

Finn exhaled through his nose before reassuring Poe again, “It’s totally fine Poe. Honestly.”

He felt like he should feel more awkward as he led Poe upstairs, telling him in a low voice where the stairs squeak to avoid waking Han or Leia, but he didn’t. It was _Poe_ , which meant that it was impossible to be awkward. Finn was also aware that it should’ve felt uncomfortable as he lent Poe a t-shirt and pyjama bottoms to sleep it, but the feeling was absent altogether.

He wondered for a brief moment at what this absence could mean, but then pushed it aside as Poe approached the double bed.

“How’s this gonna work?” Poe asked, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Finn was already under the covers on one side of his bed and replied, “Well, you’re going to climb in and go to sleep. Simple.”

“Oh, uh. Ok.”

Poe tentatively climbed in next to him and leant back into the pillow.

Satisfied that Poe was going to sleep, Finn snuggled down a bit more, tugging the quilt up to his chin, and closed his eyes.                                                                      

<->

Poe felt incredibly awkward when he woke up and there were two _very_ specific reasons for this. One: he was sharing a bed with his crush, his arm slung across Poe’s lower back, and two: Finn’s stepsister was staring at him from the doorway off Finn’s room.

“Fuck.” He said quietly before sliding out of the bed without waking Finn up. He padded over to Rey and she led him out to the corridor.

“So, uh. This is weird.” Poe said, scrubbing at the back of his neck.

“Yeah. It is a bit.” Rey replied, “So why are you here? Sleeping in Finn’s bed?”

He really didn’t want to explain what his house was like on a ‘typical’ day so he just shrugged and said, eyes drifting to the floor briefly, “I couldn’t sleep, so I called Finn, who said I could come here.”

It wasn’t entirely true, but it wasn’t entirely _false_ either. It was an explanation Poe was happy telling. He watched as Rey tilted her head as she considered what he’d said, hoping that she accepted the answer for what it was and that he wouldn’t have to go into any more detail. He didn’t mind explaining to Finn what his home life was like because he was _Finn_ , the guy he may have fallen in love with, but he didn’t want to explain fully to Rey, who he barely knew.

“Ok. He hasn’t had friends before.”

<->

When Finn woke up, the first thing he noticed was the absence of Poe. He opened his eyes and sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes and wondering where Poe had gone. He was trying to figure out where his friend had gone when he heard Rey speaking.

“Ok. He hasn’t had any friends before.”

His eyes widened when he realised that she must be speaking to Poe. Before he could fully get out of his bed and attempt to address what he was hearing, Poe turned to him, a smile lighting up his face. Distantly, Finn thought that Poe should smile more, he looked beautiful when he did. He blinked again, trying to dislodge that thought from his mind before Poe or Rey could call him out on it.

“Oh! You’re awake!” He said, striding back into the room.

Finn smiled softly at the sight of Poe wearing his pyjamas. It was a good look on him. (He kinda wanted to see it more. What did _that_ mean?) He said, “Yeah, was wondering where you’d gone.”

“Didn’t go far. Your sister was staring at me when I woke up. It was weird.”

At that, Rey laughed and said, “That’s true, it was weird. But that was only because you invited him in the middle of the night.”

“It’s not that weird.” Finn protested, but then amended what he’d said when he saw Rey raising her eyebrows in disbelief, “So maybe it was _a little_ weird, but I had to.”

He got the sense that Poe wouldn’t want him babbling about his family troubles to Rey.

“Anyway… we kinda need to get dressed and have breakfast, so if you could just leave, that’d be great Rey.”

<->

After that night, Poe couldn’t stop dreaming – whether he was awake or asleep – about being in Finn’s arms. It was starting to distract him from his poems, while also giving him yet more inspiration for them. He’d started writing poems directly about the feeling of utter contentment about being in Finn’s arms and how he longed for more. He didn’t show these poems to Finn, they were too obvious, even for him.

He had so much on his mind, it was a surprise when his lecturer announced that they should be reaching the end of their assignment.

“Even though I know that I am putting too much faith in you,” She began, facing the room before she began that day’s lecture, with the slides already loaded up on the screen behind her, “I hope that most of you – and I know _some_ of you will be scrambling at the last minute write your poems, which will be reflected in your final grade – will have almost reached the end of your writing process, having a total of six poems, one written each month. I sincerely _hope_ that you’ve at least thought about your poems, because I really don’t know what to tell you otherwise.”

Poe couldn’t concentrate for the rest of the lecture; his thoughts revolving around how he would have to say goodbye to Finn as a friend by the end of the semester. He’d known it was coming and it didn’t make it hurt any less. _Fuck._

<->

They were at the ‘usual’ spot in the coffee shop not far from university. Finn had a hot chocolate steaming in front of him and Poe had an iced frappuccino, saying that he needed his caffeine boost but as it was nicer weather, he could have it cold for once. When they’d met up an hour ago, the first thing Finn did was look carefully as Poe, to see if he could see any signs of beatings.

Finn looked down at the paper Poe had given him, soaking in the verb usage and the evocative imagery. This was so much better than what Poe had been giving him in the beginning and he didn’t hesitate to inform his friend of this.

“Really? It’s not…too much?”

Finn shook his head slowly and replied, “No, it’s…good. Damn good.”

As he passed the paper over, watching as Poe took it back carefully with a small, proud smile on his face, Finn suddenly realised that he didn’t want to let kind, amazing – _beautiful_ – Poe go. He didn’t want them to lose touch after this semester; he wanted them to keep being friends, friends that got on each other’s nerves occasions, but friends nonetheless. And maybe something more.  Finn knew he felt something more for Poe but what it was exactly, he didn’t know. He wanted that feeling more than anything in the world, except from maybe getting Poe away from his father permanently.

“I am glad to hear that, because it’s my final poem.” Poe said, setting the paper down on his notebook and placing his pen directly on the loose sheet of paper, “Which means that we’re done.”

A buzzing began Finn’s ears, he thought it was odd that Poe didn’t react to the sound. Then he realised that it was just him hearing the sound. He thought that maybe it was because Poe had said that they were done.

He needed to do something about Poe believing that it was best that they part ways. He was good with poems – it was one of the reasons he and Poe had moved from enemies that argued in class to decently close friends in the space of a few months – why not do something in the form of a poem?

<->

Poe felt a profound sense of sadness as he walked into the lecture hall for his last lecture of Classic Poetry. He almost wanted to back straight out of the doorway, to prolong the time he and Finn had together. He didn’t want to give his end of year assignment in because it meant that this year would be done and he wouldn’t have an excuse to be friends with Finn anymore and they wouldn’t hang around each other anymore and his heart would break.

Of course, Poe couldn’t do any of that because Finn had noticed him and was smiling _so widely_ it hurt Poe’s heart to see it when he knew that they were no longer going to be friends after this. Still, he smiled valiantly. He couldn’t _not_ smile at Finn. It was impossible.

He gave his poems to their lecturer, who smiled and said that she was looking forward to reading their poems, and then went to sit in front of Finn. They didn’t fight over the ‘ideal’ seat anymore, it was simply a case of whoever was first got it. It was nice to have a friendly rivalry with someone, Poe thought as he sat down.

There was a folded up piece of paper on his desk. He picked it up, saying, “What’s this?”

Finn’s voice came from behind, “Just read it Poe.”

Poe didn’t turn around to look at Finn before reading it; he had a feeling that Finn didn’t want to him to look at him whilst reading it. He opened it and began to read, just as the lecturer started the lecture. Needless to say, he didn’t pay much attention to that day’s lecture.

<->

Poe’s voice was shaky when came from behind him after the lecture, “Hey Finn, can we meet after uni?”

He was being dragged away from Poe by the crowd, so he just put a thumbs up in the air. He hoped that Poe would get the message. If not, he supposed that he could text him.

Finn knew without a doubt that the reason why Poe wanted to meet up was about the poem he’d left on Poe’s desk.  He felt nervous, he was putting his feelings out there, for the person who had become ridiculously important to him.

What if this all went wrong? What if Poe hated him now?

<->

When it came time for Poe to meet Finn at the coffee shop they’d been frequenting over the past few months – he’d texted Finn during his last lecture of the day where to meet – he had to admit nervous, stupidly so. He couldn’t help thinking that Finn had figured out that he had feeling towards him and was making fun of him. _Shit_ , if he was, Poe didn’t think he could take it. It had taken everything he had to indirectly confess to Finn in his last poem. No, he _knew_ he couldn’t take it if this was a joke.

“Hey Poe.” Finn said, “You could’ve gone it, you know.”

Plastering on a grin, he replied, “Maybe, but I was waiting for you.”

Finn smiled brilliantly and pushed the door open, letting Poe enter first. He made his way to the counter and ordered a large coffee, using the change which was scattered in the bottom of his backpack.

“I’ll find us a seat.” He said to Finn, who turned and nodded.

Poe managed to secure a table near the back, which was good because he felt like this conversation could go badly. He didn’t think that he could manage not to cry at the end of their friendship and he really didn’t want the general public viewing his weakness. He slid into the seat nearest the wall, placing his coffee on the table in front of him. He didn’t bother retrieving his notebook from his backpack because they weren’t there to work on poems together; they were there to end their tentative friendship. _Fuck_.

<->

Finn tapped his foot against the floor, impatiently waiting for his drink to be ready so he could go and join Poe at the table. He could see Poe from where he was and he thought that he saw an expression of nervousness flit across his (only) friend’s face momentarily. More than anything, he didn’t want Poe to be nervous. He wanted Poe to feel loved, which was why he was he was going to confess the feelings inside him for the beautiful boy waiting patiently.

Finally, his drink was ready and Finn could cross the coffee shop and sit down opposite Poe.

“So…” Poe said, after taking a sip of his coffee, “Why did you ask to meet?”

Finn gulped. This was it. There was no going back now.

“Uh…You read my poem yeah?”

“Yeah, it was good, but I thought you didn’t like love poems.” Poe replied, his brows creasing in confusion.

“That was true until…I discovered I had feelings for you.”

<->

“I’m sorry, what did you just say?”

“I have feelings for you.” Finn said, “They’re not love, but they could probably turn into that, so, uh, do you wanna try a relationship?”

Poe blinked, dumbfounded that his feelings were being reciprocated after all.

“I… yeah. That’d be. Great. Amazing. Fuck, I can’t believe this is happening.”

Finn smiled shyly, placing a hand on the table. An obvious invitation to Poe, who reached across with his own and intertwined their fingers. Poe felt hope spring to life in his chest when Finn smiled at him like that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this fic is finished and I’ve finished my second year of Uni. Comments would be great.

**Author's Note:**

> I actually love this story. I can’t wait to write the rest of it!


End file.
